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10 Steps to Writing a Popular Blog Post in no Time Flat

February 19th, 2010 by Andrew Swenson in snark

In a recent email, someone accused me of not being snarky enough lately. HA! You asked for it:

Here they are, 10 steps to writing a popular blog post in no time flat:

  1. Spend 2 minutes on Twitter and find a popular blog post on a hot-button issue.
  2. Open your blogging platform and start ranting in response. Logic here: rant = passion and passion = popular.
  3. If possible, make some audacious claim about Gen Y, or Gen X, or whatever generation you happen to be from. The more it inspires warm fuzzies or outright anger, the better.
  4. Think about creating an easily digestible list. [Ah, irony]
  5. Don’t acknowledge the article that started your rant. Links slow you down, and you can’t afford this one.
  6. Don’t ever stop to think through the issue critically or do any research beyond the blogs you read anyway. The clock is ticking!
  7. Channel your inner motivational speaker. It doesn’t matter if what you’re claiming is true, per se. What matters is that you inspire people to start nodding along.
  8. Leave a half-hearted plea for people to comment. Aim for quantity of comments over quality. This will make you appear to be popular and help to ease that nagging feeling that no one is reading your blog.
  9. Now that you’re done writing, go back through your post and link EVERY word that’s semi-related to another post you’ve written. This will keep people on your site longer, increase your page views, and of course, stroke your ego when you open Google Analytics.
  10. Hit publish. Make sure to retweet yourself several times over the next few days.

And there you have it.

What do you think? :)

-Andrew

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  • Andrew -
    Just ran into your blog today; like the attitude! I agree with your steps... so many people get paralyzed about what to write. In reality, if you've done your KW research, you pretty much are told what to write about. I just published an article on tweet scheduling and I agree with you 100% on #10.

    It's kind of absurd to think that as marketers, we're okay with running the same commercials, email, banners, etc., to generate as many impressions as possible. But people are afraid to RT their article more than once, as if there audience is sitting there staring at their timeline for that single tweet. You gotta let it rip, be confident and deliberate. Do that and you'll get results!

    Ryan Malone
    SmartBug Media
    An inbound marketing agency
    @RyanMalone
  • Ryan,

    You do know that this post was a sarcastic rant *against* all those things, right?

    Best,
    Andrew
    // sent via iPhone
  • Yup.
  • Thanks.

    Just making sure...
  • There are so many good writing strategies and techniques that it blows your mind. "10 steps to writing a popular blog post" is a good one. I'll stick this one in my rolodex.
  • By commenting, I'm gonna force you to comment to another comment and in the true spirit of #8 help you tally up two more WordPost.org!

    I need to make more lists of something...I'm liking your style :)
  • Thanks Brenton.

    The ironic popularity of this post has all but made me swear *never* to include a list in a blog post ever again.

    Ever.
  • Hey - it works for me!
  • Judging by the fact that this post has been one of my most popular...looks like it works for me too.

    The irony is painful.
  • hahahahahhhaha. i love it.

    #qofthday: what's a blog for if you're not ranting and making audacious claims?
  • I like to think of blogging as long-form conversation and information sharing.

    Sure rants and audacious claims have their place, but when it's all the time...it makes me kinda pissy.
  • I've noticed that easy reads are more attractive than zero-structure-no-paragraph soliloquies.

    even well presented rants are enticing.
  • So in the spirit of this post, I should just copy and paste this into my own site, right? ;-)
  • Yeah! Only weak-minded people of character worry about plagiarism.

    Go for it!
  • markwilliamschaefer
    11. Write a serious headline that has the number 10 in it. Bonus points if you can work "how to," "Zappos" or "Twitter" in, too. This will legitimize anything you write and assure that you double your tweets.
  • I said this in my Twitter reply to you too, but I feel like I should post it here again...

    Your addition is hilarious...because it's true.
  • This. is. awesome. :)

    #7 is the biggest offender, in what I see daily. People spew out these awesome inspirational theories and plans and mantras, with nothing to back any of it up. Then more people start worshiping and praising. Then I usually throw up.

    Ah, the sheer irony of this post itself...heh.
  • All that vomiting is probably bad for your teeth.

    What bothers me the most is that this post (which, of course violates itself) has more Tweets and comments than most everything else I write.

    Now if you'll excuse me, I'm feeling a bit nauseous...
  • Well done man, well done. I've never been a fan of:

    1) Writing for the sake of controversy
    2) Ranting/lashing out against another opinion (again, for the sake of buzz)
    3) Bloggers who plea for comments and never take time to respond/follow up with conversation.

    On interlinking - I hear what you're saying here and don't do this excessively, but it is good SEO practice. And there's something to be said for making your readers aware of things you've written in the past. A conversation doesn't have to die just because the post has a time-stamp of 6 months ago, you know?
  • Thanks for stopping by Matt.

    I think there's a place for conversation about controversial issues, but it has to be completed with well thought-out argumentation, and dare I say it, research. I guess that includes calling out a difference in opinion with someone. These things aren't bad, it's just when the focus is more for the sake of traffic than for the sake of the argument that bothers me.

    On responding to comments, I think its a responsibility if you want to have more than a simple one-way exchange, so we're in total agreement there.

    But about interlinking: I never meant for this post to be a list of 10 things you should never do, and I think interlinking is great if you have a relevant post to link to. What bugs the heck out of me though, is when I follow a link to a post that's not even related.
  • Hey Andrew -

    Agreed that controversy and debate is great - when founded in research and thought. Writing "for the sake of" controversy or instigating "for the sake of" debate is rarely valuable and often harmful.

    With responding to comments - it's funny - People used to ask how/why I responded to EVERY comments and to be honest, I just think it would be weird not to. Yes, sometimes there's little to say in response to a "Great Post" comment, but it just feels weird to me NOT responding to someone who's taken the time to respond to you. I can tell you're on the same page.

    And 100% agree RE: interlinkling - hyperlinking words like "or" & "the" to a post you wrote 2 years ago is ridiculous - and yes, I've seen this before.
  • The type of "for the sake of" controversy we're talking about is why I don't watch cable news. More heat than light there.

    How do you respond to a "great post" comment though..."thanks?" I think sometimes the dialogue can become a bit forced. What's your take on that?
  • Good question - while I love a good debate and discussion, it's inevitable some folks won't give you much more than "great post". But you know, even that required effort - and as a matter of respect, I still believe it's good practice to acknowledge it. It can seem a bit forced but that acknowledgement can be the difference in whether or no the person comes back and gets involved in conversation in the future. The 'little moments' are what lead to long term relationships.
  • Alright, you've won me over.

    Thanks. :)
  • Ron
    This is fantastic. Hehe..
  • Thanks Ron!
  • JP
    Great list! But, you need to sharpen up your understanding of the word "irony."
  • Hmm...Perhaps you could clarify.

    My thought was that using a post with no external links in an easily digestible form to speak out against a post with no external links in an easily digestible form is comically ironic. Furthering what I'm viewing as comic irony is that this post has turned out to be one of the more popular that I've written...

    Unless I'm missing something?
  • JP
    Oh, I see... with your explanation you're right on.

    When I read: "4) Think about creating an easily digestible list. [Ah, irony]"... since you did indeed create an easily digestible list (this was expected), it wasn't ironic. But, I see what you mean by your explanation.

    Anyways, once again... a killer list!!

    Take care.
  • OH! In your explanation, that's right. Badly communicated on my part.

    Thanks for clearing that up for me (I felt kinda stupid for a minute there).
  • Sweet! Headed to Twitter now...
  • I feel like I've let Twitter down with this one. I think I only Tweeted about it once or twice directly.

    Maybe I'll wait a week and start sending out Tweets about my old content. Yeah! That's perfect!
  • JHepCat72
    Now I know what I've been doing wrong, Andrew.

    Thanks for hepping me up!
  • I'm not sure how to take that... are you being sarcastic or serious?
  • JHepCat72
    I guess you're right, Andrew--appreciation of irony involves use of prior knowledge.

    I'm agreeing with you.
  • Sorry, I had a response typed, and then I was like, wait...am I being flippant? Thanks for clarifying.

    Glad someone agrees with me.
  • JHepCat72
    Wickedly done, my friend! Pointed and pithy.
  • Hahaha! I almost fell out of my chair when I saw the title! I thought "Dear Christ... Hell has frozen over. If wordpost is whoring out the universe will cease to be. Is there nothing sacred anymore..." And then I read it. :)

    There is a fine boundary between promotion and spam. I will admit that as a newer blogger I'm learning the shape of that boundary the hard way (at times by crossing it).

    This needs to be required reading for all bloggers out there.

    Ah... but you did forget 2 Points:

    11. Adding additional points in comments of other blogs that may have no correlation with that bloggers key points!

    12. Including a link back to said post in those comments like http://www.BloggingSocialNetworkMediaMembersOnl...

    Snark on Andrew... Snark on.
  • I'm glad to report that hell is, in fact, sill very hot.

    But I will admit that I've done 11. and 12. before. We're all in the middle of a cycle of learning. My biggest angst though is the crappy, self-focused content I see all the time. I read some echo posts and I wonder what fun it could have been to write. Nothing original, nothing exciting.

    I will say that I've enjoyed your "How to be an "Olympic" Entrepreneur" series—it's fresh and seems like it's been really fun to write. It has also kept me coming back every day (even if I am a lazy lurker who never comments).

    And one final thing. I agree that there is a fine line between promotion and spam, but if you send out 10 in a period of 2 hours, all with the same copy, I will unfollow you and cease to respect you (you as in the general "you").
  • You are sissy's. Do whatever the hell you want as long as you have respect. Why does it matter what we do? I don't even know what blogging is yet and I get called a blogger all the time. Whatever, talk s*** bout what I do, the problem is more that you care...

    :) - Love both of you fools!
  • Let's fight right now.

    Kidding.

    I don't think there's a set of prescriptive rules about social interaction. So I agree that it's gaining and keeping respect that's important.

    I just also think we can categorize a certain set of activities as generally douchey.

    But I don't think what you do is douchey, especially considering the respect you've got.

    So there.
  • Need sutures for the gut I have just split.
  • Was there a squee in there?
  • andreavlewis
    You're spot on Andrew. In fact, after reading this post I'm reminded that my most commented posts were rant-based (rant-based sounds sort of foul, doesn't it?) But, I have to say, some of my posts I took a great deal of time, care and effort got no love.

    But, I don't think the reason why we're blogging is to just garner comments? Do you?

    Great post. I love topics that keep the conversation rolling...
  • Thanks Andrea.

    I agree that we don't blog (at least I don't blog) just to garner comments. I use writing as a way of thinking, and I use this platform as a mode of expression, as a place to share what I know and as a place to test my ideas.

    Other than business/personal brand, why do you blog?
  • andreavlewis
    Besides, personal branding and professional networking, I blog because it's creatively fulfilling. Children are always encouraged to be creative. Art, discovery and imagination were activities that were revered when we were youngsters, but as adults creativity gets traded for jobs, paychecks and life.
  • I think yes. :)

    It makes me sad how people will always trade worthwhile content for sensational "discussion." Especially as I get to know some of them better. Sometimes it makes me wonder "are you just playing me when we chat or are you playing the world when you write?"
  • Well said.

    I think, sometimes hot issues can have serious discussion come as a result. For example, Mack Collier's analysis of the Kevin Smith v. Southwest Airlines issue is dead on: http://moblogsmoproblems.blogspot.com/2010/02/k...

    But of course, his post is based on critical thinking and analysis...and not pandering or playing.
  • That does it, I am going to RT this just cause you said nice things about me ;)

    And thanks!
  • Success! Thanks again for the RT.
  • LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
    LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
    LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
    LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
    LLLLLLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
    OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
    OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
    OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
    OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
    OOOOOOOOOOOOVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV
    VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV
    VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV
    EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE IT. I was laughing and still am... Kick ass bro and ironically you have others laughing too... Maybe the secret is calling bs on what everyone is really thinking. (wait, that is comedy right?)
  • Okay, I refused to comment back until this comment was no longer breaking my site. Looks like everything is cleared up.

    If this is comedic, I think it's the first time in life I've managed to be funny. Just ask my wife.
  • Excellent. I like snarky and absurd lists. You win with this one.

    If you read this comment, reply to it. (my half-hearted attempt at getting comments)
  • Thanks!

    I read and (most of the time) respond to every comment on this blog. I feel like a two-way exchange is far better than me pontificating all the time.

    ...and if you hate something I write, tell me that too. I gotta know what sucks so I stop doing it. :)
  • Oh, don't worry. I'm not afraid to speak up if I disagree. Same goes for anything I write too, though. I enjoy spirited debate and I'm not afraid to admit I'm wrong or change an opinion if given a few good reasons why. :-)
  • Reply
  • Right on.
  • HAHA. I think that's plenty snarky. Funny and thought provoking top 10 list. It's amazing because there was a time when I'd probably take half of what you said here and do it. Hopefully that's not what anybody thinks of my blog now.
  • I don't think that about your blog, especially considering your recent post re: focusing on valuable content.

    And I think we've all done some of these things from time to time. Nothing wrong with smart marketing and balancing the cost of long posts, it just bothers me when posts dissolve into content for the sake of content.
  • abbyannette
    I think this is the first post I have literally laughed out loud at. Congrats. :)

    Re #8 - Isn't that nagging feeling clarified by your Google analytics reports? Or can you just log-in yourself from several computes to boost your self-esteem?

    This coincides with my latest question on Twitter that I sometimes mumble to the thin air around me. Q: How many people on Twitter have their own blogs and Web sites? A: More than probably should.
  • I think I've finally arrived now that I've made someone laugh.

    Point taken on #8. Silly logic stuff.

    A blog can change your life, your outlook, ect, but not if you stay in the echo chamber. I don't think the issue is that too many people have blogs/sites, just that the amount of noise we're producing is far greater than useful information.
  • I like Snarky Andrew. I always get a kick out of it when people RT other people who have RT them. I'm afraid that Twitter may soon fall victim to infinite regress. Fail Whale alert!
  • On RTing only those who RT people who RT you, etc. I think Carlos Miceli makes a great point in his post and the conversation afterward.

    You should check it out: "How to Build a Community of Drones." - http://www.owlsparks.com/fear/how-to-build-a-co...
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